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In 2007, I began my original website, Sonshine's Haven. In 2007, it was turned into a blog and used to keep family updated on my first husband's fight with liver cancer. He passed away November of 2009. We were married for 34+ wonderful years and this journals some of that grief process I've gone through.

I have since remarried another widower, but Mike is missed dearly, and will always be a big part of my life.

At times, all of us will be called to act as witnesses to the suffering of another. We will be unable to affect the outcome physically. Words will fail us. Prayer will seem futile. And yet, the act of bearing witness to someone else's trials is a sacred sorrow that offers and astounding glimpse of eternal joy." by Ginger Garrett

"Being willing to stay with a loved one throughout their travail, can be difficult....YES! But offering yourselves as faithful companions on a dark and dreadful journey can be an unmeasured blessing." (paraphrased by me)

9.10.2008

Slow Me Down, Lord!

It has been a busy 24 hours since we came home. I have been busy doing laundry and trying to figure out a better way to pack, now that I know where we'll be staying, where the laundry mat is at the hotel, and what dries the quickest. :) My goal is to pack less, but I don't know how well I'll adhere to that. I need to take less, to have a better way of handling the luggage at the airport in Houston, and to and from the hotels.

I began to blog an update last night, but in the midst of it, I was struggling to stay awake. I made a couple of big mistakes over the past couple of days. One yesterday, was when we got to the airport in Houston yesterday at 6 a.m. I was rushing around loading the car, returning the rental car, and getting luggage checked in, when I surprised myself by remembering to take my Dramamine on time...before the flight! :) Only problem was, it wasn't Dramamine that I popped into my mouth. As I was swallowing the two pills, it occurred to me the two white pills were oval, not round. I had pulled them from a generic pill box I keep in my purse, which doesn't have the pills labeled. I saw white, and popped them in quickly. So anyway...I'm continuing on through the airport thinking uh oh! What did I just take, and how is it going to affect me? I was trying to figure it out before I mentioned anything to Mike. Well, eventually I figured out I had taken some anti-anxiety medication (Xanax) given to me to help me sleep at nights. I sleep very well with one! :) I figured I better skip the Dramamine at this point to have half a chance of walking on and off the plane! :) Of course, when I told Mike about what I had done, he gave me a hard time all the way home, and after. He also has another story to tell at some point, of another mistake I made, that I won't bore you with right now.

Mike is doing good. He handled the trip home fairly well. He was sore, of course, but being home is doing him a world of good. He got to see Drew, but at a distance. Drew is sick. So has been Drew's daddy actually. So we're having to keep Mike at arms distance. Mike still loved seeing Drew though, and hearing all of his new learned words, songs, etc. Ethan was also over and just kept staring at Mike in the beginning. We're guessing Mike's new incoming hair and beard is throwing Ethan a little. But Ethan got to chuckling a couple of times when Mike was making faces and noises at him, so he's warming up to him. Of course, Mike isn't allowed to hold anything more than 10 pounds for 10 days, so Ethan has been sort of off limits too.

Time is just passing too quickly right now. We want more than ever to stay here...yet we also want this surgery over too. Our trips to MD Anderson have been so unpredictable, so we're having to be so guarded to protect our hearts from disappointments. Our trips also keep giving us other challenges too....like two hurricanes, troubles with rental car agencies, etc. Some days it just feels like we're magnets, attracting trouble. :) But when we stop feeling sorry for ourselves, we realize how very fortunate we are, and how blessed we are to have so many people loving and caring about us. God is teaching us so much through everything we're going through, and we pray He is also helping others through our situation. Regardless of what is happening....God is faithful and good!

How you can be praying.......
1. For God to protect Mike from catching anything before this surgery takes place...and after (virus, infections, etc.)
2. That our next trip to MD Anderson has no diversions and we can take care of everything we need to for Mike to be healthy.
3. That I will experience God's strength and peace when it's needed the most....and maybe to also take an extra breath before popping pills into my mouth so quickly. ;)
4. That our home, children, grandchildren, and pets, will be safe and protected while we're apart from each other.

Thank you for caring so deeply about us and wanting to help in so many ways. You are such a blessing to us and we're so grateful for each one of you!

"Some trust in chariots and some in horses, but I trust in the name of You, The Lord My God! My enemy will be brought to his knees and ultimately fall, but I will rise up and stand firm." (Psalm 20:7,8 Praying God's Word)

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