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In 2007, I began my original website, Sonshine's Haven. In 2007, it was turned into a blog and used to keep family updated on my first husband's fight with liver cancer. He passed away November of 2009. We were married for 34+ wonderful years and this journals some of that grief process I've gone through.

I have since remarried another widower, but Mike is missed dearly, and will always be a big part of my life.

At times, all of us will be called to act as witnesses to the suffering of another. We will be unable to affect the outcome physically. Words will fail us. Prayer will seem futile. And yet, the act of bearing witness to someone else's trials is a sacred sorrow that offers and astounding glimpse of eternal joy." by Ginger Garrett

"Being willing to stay with a loved one throughout their travail, can be difficult....YES! But offering yourselves as faithful companions on a dark and dreadful journey can be an unmeasured blessing." (paraphrased by me)

4.28.2009

Mike and I spoke with our oncologist this morning and more labs were taken. One of Mike's liver markers is still WAY out of range (normal being 38-126, Mike's being 2036). Our oncologist here didn't appear troubled by that number. Our oncologist in Houston mentioned we shouldn't proceed with treatments unless that number came down, and they even suggested we have another study done, to rule something additonal out.

We've listened to Houston before, when they suggested testing for colon cancer and thyroid cancer. Both, (praise God) came back clear. But our medical insurance comes to an end Thursday, and we begin paying for our "high-risk" insurance for Mike. It's hard to know what to do with a second opinion, and who you should ultimately listen to. Mike and I have reached a point where we are physically, mentally, and emotionally worn out. It would just make things easier to trust our oncologist here than to keep on spending money to rule things out.

Treatments will begin next Tuesday morning. We will repeat labs again before the infusion, so maybe we can pray down this alkaline phosphatase count before then, and it won't be an issue.

Mike and I appreciate your thoughts and prayers, more than we could ever say. Just when we feel we can't take things anymore, we somehow find the strength and are lifted back on our feet. We know that isn't by happenstance.

"He giveth power to the faint; and to them that have no might He increaseth strength." Isaiah 40:29
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