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In 2007, I began my original website, Sonshine's Haven. In 2007, it was turned into a blog and used to keep family updated on my first husband's fight with liver cancer. He passed away November of 2009. We were married for 34+ wonderful years and this journals some of that grief process I've gone through.

I have since remarried another widower, but Mike is missed dearly, and will always be a big part of my life.

At times, all of us will be called to act as witnesses to the suffering of another. We will be unable to affect the outcome physically. Words will fail us. Prayer will seem futile. And yet, the act of bearing witness to someone else's trials is a sacred sorrow that offers and astounding glimpse of eternal joy." by Ginger Garrett

"Being willing to stay with a loved one throughout their travail, can be difficult....YES! But offering yourselves as faithful companions on a dark and dreadful journey can be an unmeasured blessing." (paraphrased by me)

11.09.2010

I'm sure it goes without saying how fun it is to become grandma of two, new, little grand babies!

This morning I had some cuddle time with Emma and she is just adorable!  I'm so blessed God is giving me the opportunity to love on four little ones who call me Grandma....Nama; anything their little bitty hearts want to name me. 

I would have given anything to have shared this experience with Mike. It was so special laughing together at the silly things the boys would do while in our care.  There was just another level of cherishing and joy that I experienced in his presence with our grandchildren.  That void is painful for me now.  The shared energy allowed both of us to keep pace with them, and made being silly...okay. 

I'll never forget Mike's laughter and smile, and the joy he brought to all of our lives.  I hardly measure up to what impact he had.  In some ways, it will be easier with Alyssa and Emma, not to have that longing in their hearts for someone they grew to love so deeply.  Yet...they will be missing a true treasure.  I can only pray God will lead me to be a blessing to them, in spite of myself.
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1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Beverly,
Oh I do remember how Mike loved those grandbabies. He talked about them non-stop. I know you and the kids miss him and that sometimes it seems more than you can tolerate, but I wanted to tell you that you are awesome in your own right. Mike definitely knew how awesome you are....he talked about that all of the time as well. You are a blessing to your kids and grandkids and those of us lucky enough to be called your friend. As much as Mike was a blessing to you.....you were a blessing to him. I hurt for you that you have a difficult time with the void that was created when Mike left this earthly journey to go to his heavenly home. I know that adding a grandchild...especially two beautiful girls has to accentuate that void even more, but know in your heart that you are a true blessing to everyone in your life and that those girls will know their Grandpa through the memories of you guys. What an awesome legacy. I know in my heart that Mike is a witness to the beauty and greatness that is his new little grandaughters. I will continue to pray for you. I love you.
Kim Olson

November 9, 2010 at 4:11 PM

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