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In 2007, I began my original website, Sonshine's Haven. In 2007, it was turned into a blog and used to keep family updated on my first husband's fight with liver cancer. He passed away November of 2009. We were married for 34+ wonderful years and this journals some of that grief process I've gone through.

I have since remarried another widower, but Mike is missed dearly, and will always be a big part of my life.

At times, all of us will be called to act as witnesses to the suffering of another. We will be unable to affect the outcome physically. Words will fail us. Prayer will seem futile. And yet, the act of bearing witness to someone else's trials is a sacred sorrow that offers and astounding glimpse of eternal joy." by Ginger Garrett

"Being willing to stay with a loved one throughout their travail, can be difficult....YES! But offering yourselves as faithful companions on a dark and dreadful journey can be an unmeasured blessing." (paraphrased by me)

5.21.2009

Everything has been incredibly hard for Mike today. After eating breakfast this morning, he crawled back in to bed and slept until 2:30 this afternoon. We had expected him to improve while on hiatus from treatment, but I suppose there is such a concentrated strength of chemicals still in his body, the side effects just keep on battering him.

It's painful seeing him hurt. He aches all over and is incredibly weak. It's painful looking at him. He has red blotches and sores popping up all over his skin. He continues to struggle with his appetite. It's almost a relief watching him sleep, because he isn't suffering. I'm really worried how Mike is going to be able to continue on with these treatments, if they should begin back up this coming Tuesday.

I know I don't even need to ask for your prayers. I know we have them. Thank you.
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