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In 2007, I began my original website, Sonshine's Haven. In 2007, it was turned into a blog and used to keep family updated on my first husband's fight with liver cancer. He passed away November of 2009. We were married for 34+ wonderful years and this journals some of that grief process I've gone through.

I have since remarried another widower, but Mike is missed dearly, and will always be a big part of my life.

At times, all of us will be called to act as witnesses to the suffering of another. We will be unable to affect the outcome physically. Words will fail us. Prayer will seem futile. And yet, the act of bearing witness to someone else's trials is a sacred sorrow that offers and astounding glimpse of eternal joy." by Ginger Garrett

"Being willing to stay with a loved one throughout their travail, can be difficult....YES! But offering yourselves as faithful companions on a dark and dreadful journey can be an unmeasured blessing." (paraphrased by me)

5.26.2009

Mike had his oncology appointment this morning. The doctor was surprised at Mike's tremendous fatigue, given that his labs looked good. He was ordering a TSH test to determine if his thyroid measurements are off...which can cause fatigue. He felt Mike may have some kind of infection, being that he had a temperature a few days ago, and had a low grade temp this morning. So Mike will begin taking Levaquin today.

They didn't seem concerned with Mike's low blood pressure. It was 90/50 this morning at the doctor's office. Mike had lost weight, but we already expected that, being he has been sleeping through meals lately.

The doctor didn't see any reason why Mike couldn't go ahead with treatments, so Mike had another infusion this morning. He is sleeping the Benadryl and steroids off right now. The doctor said that the Xeoloda is probably what is causing Mike the most trouble in treatments right now...but with Mike's "bring it on" attitude, the doctor felt this was the key in Mike being where he is at.

Mike's sense of humor is such a gift! He is such a clown when he goes into the treatment room. As soon as he enters he can be heard down the hall, giving everyone a hard time, and cracking up the patients. He swears the nurses in there, quickly and purposely, hook up his IV first, to shut him up and make him fall asleep. He even accuses them of doubling up his Benadryl dose for that reason. I believe with all my heart that God is using Mike in that treatment room, lightening the heavy load so many are carrying in there.

We learned Mike's new medical insurance ID number when we were at the doctor's office this morning. So Mike officially has insurance now...even though we're still waiting on the packet to come in the mail. The office was able to look up the information on the computer. That helped Mike and I let out a huge sigh! What an answer to prayer, to have him covered again.

Tomorrow, I begin my new job. Please pray for my adjustment, and for Mike's protection while I'm away from him.

Mike and I are so grateful for all of the "angels" in our life. Each one of you have lifted our load from time to time, and you could never understand the depth of the brush marks you have left on our hearts. We're so blessed!

Thank you for all of your prayers!

"I would have lost heart, unless I had believed that I would see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. Wait on the Lord; be of good courage, and He shall strengthen your heart: wait, I say, on the Lord! Psalm 27:13-14
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