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In 2007, I began my original website, Sonshine's Haven. In 2007, it was turned into a blog and used to keep family updated on my first husband's fight with liver cancer. He passed away November of 2009. We were married for 34+ wonderful years and this journals some of that grief process I've gone through.

I have since remarried another widower, but Mike is missed dearly, and will always be a big part of my life.

At times, all of us will be called to act as witnesses to the suffering of another. We will be unable to affect the outcome physically. Words will fail us. Prayer will seem futile. And yet, the act of bearing witness to someone else's trials is a sacred sorrow that offers and astounding glimpse of eternal joy." by Ginger Garrett

"Being willing to stay with a loved one throughout their travail, can be difficult....YES! But offering yourselves as faithful companions on a dark and dreadful journey can be an unmeasured blessing." (paraphrased by me)

6.10.2009

I'm not sure if my mom wanted me to update this blog or not, but I felt I should. My dad is going to Baptist hospital this evening due to abnormal bleeding from his biliary drain. Please pray for their saftey and for dad's healing. We are very concerned.

(Dad is being admitted to Baptist and will be undergoing a CT of his abdomen tonight and other lab work to try and find out what is going on. They hope to learn more tomorrow. )

Amber

I don't know what to report on Mike. He still has a fever, although this afternoon it is down to 100 degrees. The doctor's office forgot to call in the medications last night, so that was a wasted trip. Today, when I went by the pharmacy, they had only called in more Nexium for Mike, and stronger pain medication. I know we asked for an antibiotic. That was what I was expecting.

I went on in to work today, even though Mike's temperature was 101 degrees. I expected to be called to bring Mike in. Instead, I came home at noon and made some lunch for Mike, which he hardly ate. Either things don't taste right, or his mouth hurts. I can't get him to drink very much, so I'm sure between that, and the fever, he's dehydrated. He's sleeping 80% of the day.

Mike's right biliary drain isn't working correctly. Mike is content for us to change the bandages twice a day instead of having it redone. I think he's fed up with the way it's being done in LR and just letting things go. That might explain the infection....or the Xeloda may have things so aggravated, that it's causing the fever. He has a huge blister on the bottom of his left foot, from the Xeloda. His throat is sore. He hurts everywhere.

I'm a little weary tonight because I don't know what to do. I can't force Mike to do what he doesn't want to do, and to be honest...I don't blame him. He hurts so bad right now. I'm trying to be at every appointment so the doctors/nurses and I are communicating, but I feel there's a gap...since I'm not the patient. I'm not sure what Mike is saying to them over the phone, when I'm not here. Mike would rather just sleep away everything he is feeling right now. I wish I could escape too.

Please pray for Mike to make a turn around and get back on his feet. If I need to step up more....please pray I will know when and how. Please pray for God's protection over Mike with this possibility of infection. I'm so grateful for your thoughtfulness and concern for us.

"I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." Phil. 4:13
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