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In 2007, I began my original website, Sonshine's Haven. In 2007, it was turned into a blog and used to keep family updated on my first husband's fight with liver cancer. He passed away November of 2009. We were married for 34+ wonderful years and this journals some of that grief process I've gone through.
I have since remarried another widower, but Mike is missed dearly, and will always be a big part of my life.
At times, all of us will be called to act as witnesses to the suffering of another. We will be unable to affect the outcome physically. Words will fail us. Prayer will seem futile. And yet, the act of bearing witness to someone else's trials is a sacred sorrow that offers and astounding glimpse of eternal joy." by Ginger Garrett
"Being willing to stay with a loved one throughout their travail, can be difficult....YES! But offering yourselves as faithful companions on a dark and dreadful journey can be an unmeasured blessing." (paraphrased by me)
7.21.2009
A chest xray was done on Mike this morning and it showed there is fluid in Mike's lungs, but we're holding off doing anything until we get the scan results next week. The doctor would like to know "why" there is fluid there.
An ammonia test was ran on Mike's blood work today and it indicated ammonia levels are building back up again in Mike's abdomen. Mike will need to resume one of the drugs he had stopped taking that helps get rid of this. Ammonia building up quickly, can turn into the Hepatic Encephalopathy, which is definitely NOT what we want to happen. It not only landed Mike in the hospital the last time, but it also can cause permanent damage. Instead of Mike needing to take this medicine 3 times a day, like initially prescribed,....or once a day, as Mike and his oncologist had come to an agreement about....Mike will only need to take this twice a week. Mike was relieved to hear that. Mike doesn't like the taste of this medicine and had stopped taking it altogether. So, he'll be getting back on that.
The doctor is also very concerned about Mike's loss of weight. Mike knows what he needs to do, but his body isn't wanting to cooperate. He feels constantly full, when he's hardly eaten anything. If he forces food down, his body tries to vomit it back up. We're just in a more precarious position than we would like to be right now, with his weight. Mike needs strength to fight his cancer, and a strong body to hold up, when undergoing treatment. So somehow, someway, we need to pray for Mike's appetite to be stimulated and increased.
Mike had a very low moment today after the doctor visit. I think he misunderstood something the doctor said, and he battled with that conversation most of the afternoon. As hard as you try to shake it off... Some days can just be harder than other days, and things can quickly get upside down, without effort. We would appreciate your prayers as we continue to deal with all of this....the physical symptoms, the political nonsense with insurance companies, doctor bills, etc., and just the delicate walk of keeping the right attitude and perspective.
Mike can react to something the doctor says....I will react to whatever Mike is feeling, and the downward spiral can just get out of hand fast. We desperately need God's strength and peace, to weather everything we're going through. We're only human, and we're not going to stay on top of things all the time. There is so much pressure, it can get a little heavy at times, just trying to live life as "normal" as possible...when everything is far from normal. Everything can look a little different from our perspective. We need lots of grace, mercy, and patience.
So, that's where we're at, right now. We would appreciate your prayers so much. Thank you for your sweet cards, comforting words and encouragement. We need all of you so much, and want you to know how much your friendship and love mean to us.
2 comments:
I sure am praying for you guys and the long roller coaster you've been on! May you experience God's grace and mercy new every morning!
Greg
we're daily lifting you up to the Great Physician and praying that "the peace of God which transcends all understanding will guard your hearts & minds in Christ Jesus"
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