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In 2007, I began my original website, Sonshine's Haven. In 2007, it was turned into a blog and used to keep family updated on my first husband's fight with liver cancer. He passed away November of 2009. We were married for 34+ wonderful years and this journals some of that grief process I've gone through.

I have since remarried another widower, but Mike is missed dearly, and will always be a big part of my life.

At times, all of us will be called to act as witnesses to the suffering of another. We will be unable to affect the outcome physically. Words will fail us. Prayer will seem futile. And yet, the act of bearing witness to someone else's trials is a sacred sorrow that offers and astounding glimpse of eternal joy." by Ginger Garrett

"Being willing to stay with a loved one throughout their travail, can be difficult....YES! But offering yourselves as faithful companions on a dark and dreadful journey can be an unmeasured blessing." (paraphrased by me)

9.13.2009

Praise God! Mike is feeling so much better today.  I need to confess, he has had his daughter and I, very worried the past couple of days.  There have been days when I've doubted there was any strength left in him.  He hasn't been able to do very much except sleep.  He wasn't very coherent.  His food was coming up more than it was staying down. We were dwindling down to only a few things he could do for himself.  It has had me questioning if I should continue leaving him home alone. But a day like today brings so much hope.  It washes over me and lifts my heart.  I'm so grateful for God allowing me some time to sigh deeply and rest from worrying.  I know I shouldn't worry, but how can I help not to?!

I praise God for this special bedsore pillow Tommie and Ken loaned Mike.  It has been such a blessing.  And I praise God for Dr. B's patches he rounded up for us.  And I praise God for Dr. H's visits to Mike, keeping his company and allowing Mike to feel like a human being, by talking about "guy" stuff.  And I praise God for my job, and the loving people of FBCR, who have been so loving, unconditional, and comforting.  And my family and friends who never stop giving....their time, their hugs, their prayers, their service, and their comfort.  Knowing we're not alone, has been key in surviving and persevering.

We would be lost without our children. (all four of them)  They have needed to fill some big shoes the past two years.  Their love and support has reassured us of their maturity and loving hearts.  They haven't ran away from the problems, but have ran towards us to help in any way they could. 

When I have pause from the stress and worry....all I want to do is praise God for all the blessings He sends our way.  The bad can be so extremely painful and bad some times.  It's hard some days just to raise our heads off our pillow.  But God's goodness, is good all the time, and washes over us in the midst of the storm. 

Thank you for continuing to read our blog and lifting our names before God. Note: "Reflection" below.
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