The Determination of a Man

I left Mike briefly by himself today to go see his mom in the nursing home and take care of some things she had asked for. I hadn't been up there since before Mike's set back. It was a hard visit for me, because I knew she would want to discuss Mike, and what had been going on. I knew I had to be careful in stating things, to not frighten or upset her. I did fine, but I came home a little down. For some reason, our conversation reminded me of Mike's dad's battle with cancer seven years ago. On my way home I was silently reflecting on what she had gone through, and what she must have been feeling at the time.

You're never truly prepared to go through something like this. That is odd for me to even hear myself say, because I knew Mike had his first bout with cancer before I even met or married him, and then Amber was just six months old when he came out of remission the second go around. If anyone should be familiar or prepared for this, you would think I would be. But it can be such a lonely and frightening journey.

I draw most of my strength from my faith. It was when Mike had cancer the second time that brought me to a place where I accepted Christ as my Savior and invited Him into my heart. I knew no matter what, God would never leave me, and I could crawl up into His arms and rest. Twenty eight years later, and He's still faithful. When it gets too frightening or lonely, His arms still reach out and close around me.

The remainder of my strength comes from my husband, my family, and my friends. I wouldn't be where I am today with out their encouragement, prayers and unfailing love. There hasn't been one, who wasn't willing to step down into this scary mess, and stand beside me. I'm so grateful and so fortunate.

Mike asked today how long had it been since he was released from the hospital, and I remarked one week exactly. The answer surprised him and seemed to have lit a small fire underneath him. Ever since 5 p.m. he has been up, without oxygen, with both tubes capped off, and moving around. He even drummed a little. I haven't known quite how to react....alarmed or encouraged, but I've learned something about Mike over the years. He's a fighter. He made the comment today, "Never underestimate the power of God, the miracle of medicine, or the determination of a man."

Thank you for your continued demonstration of love to our family and for your consistent prayers.

"Peace is not a smooth, untroubled river beneath a sunlit sky, serene and warm...The peaceful heart is like a trusting songbird who clings to hope and sings throughout the storm." BJ Hoff