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In 2007, I began my original website, Sonshine's Haven. In 2007, it was turned into a blog and used to keep family updated on my first husband's fight with liver cancer. He passed away November of 2009. We were married for 34+ wonderful years and this journals some of that grief process I've gone through.

I have since remarried another widower, but Mike is missed dearly, and will always be a big part of my life.

At times, all of us will be called to act as witnesses to the suffering of another. We will be unable to affect the outcome physically. Words will fail us. Prayer will seem futile. And yet, the act of bearing witness to someone else's trials is a sacred sorrow that offers and astounding glimpse of eternal joy." by Ginger Garrett

"Being willing to stay with a loved one throughout their travail, can be difficult....YES! But offering yourselves as faithful companions on a dark and dreadful journey can be an unmeasured blessing." (paraphrased by me)

12.04.2009

Well, my nine year old puppies need to be put on a special food diet due to their test results.  Fortunately, it isn't anything major, but it does involve their kidneys and a change has to be made.  Now they are on thyroid medication, a steroid, staph medication and special food.  Gracious! 

They believe Chloe and Hailey are also reacting to Mike not being in the home anymore. Chloe (Mike's baby) has been trembling at night. So, in efforts to sooth her, I've allowed them to sleep in an easy chair next to my bed on a quilt.  I can only imagine what Mike would be thinking,..because there was a rule that the pups would never be allowed to get on any furniture, accept the leather sofa. (which Mike broke and initiated that rule)

Holding off making any legal decisions today until my sister's lawyer could give us a second opinion; I ventured out to try and buy a Christmas present by myself.  I don't think I was ready for the flood of feelings that came my way.  I'm really struggling with Christmas.  I know my children and grandchildren need for me to be as "normal" as possible, but I'm not sure I'll get it together in time.  I'm ususally amongest the first to put up decorations, etc., but this year it is painful to even think of.  Maybe it will be possible to eventually do something really crazy and non-traditional, but I'm not sure I'll get myself to that point in time.  Amber and I are suppose to go out and do our Angel tree shopping tomorrow.  I pray I can still have that joy.

Thank you for visiting my blog.  I'm so grateful to have your thoughts and prayers.
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