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In 2007, I began my original website, Sonshine's Haven. In 2007, it was turned into a blog and used to keep family updated on my first husband's fight with liver cancer. He passed away November of 2009. We were married for 34+ wonderful years and this journals some of that grief process I've gone through.
I have since remarried another widower, but Mike is missed dearly, and will always be a big part of my life.
At times, all of us will be called to act as witnesses to the suffering of another. We will be unable to affect the outcome physically. Words will fail us. Prayer will seem futile. And yet, the act of bearing witness to someone else's trials is a sacred sorrow that offers and astounding glimpse of eternal joy." by Ginger Garrett
"Being willing to stay with a loved one throughout their travail, can be difficult....YES! But offering yourselves as faithful companions on a dark and dreadful journey can be an unmeasured blessing." (paraphrased by me)
7.31.2008
Change of Plans
Of course, after the days of being told he'd change rooms and get discharged and multiple complications, it's really hard to say that for certain. Please pray for his recovery and for my mother who is driving back home tonight. She doesn't mention it often, but she has chronic pain and has been off her medication today because she ran out and she hasn't eaten much these past few days. Please pray for both to regain their strength and for my mom as she cares for my dad.
The Latest
My father is working on getting released from CCU. I'm not certain if that means he'll go to another floor or be able to go home. The hold up right now is his bilirubin count which is over 11, normal being 1. Also his oxygen/co2 level is lower than they'd like it to be without him using oxygen. My mother is also concerned about chest congestion he has developed while in the hospital. My mother plans to return to Russellville briefly if my father is not released because she has run out of her own medication and clothes and will need to gather what she needs from home.
That's all I know as of right now. I will continue to update and we appreciate your prayers and support.
7.30.2008
Afternoon Update
Thank you for your prayers. I will continue to update you if I hear any more news.
Wednesday Morning Update
Thank you for your prayers.
Current Update from Amber
After surgery, my father was not doing well. To be honest, we weren't sure he was going to make it. They almost moved him to ICU because his blood pressure was dangerously low and they weren't sure if he was bleeding internally. But it has recovered now and he is in the Critical Care Unit at Baptist. They hope to release him tomorrow if he is doing better.
I'm sure I'm forgetting some details I wanted to share with you this evening, but I do want to ask for continued prayer for my dad. Please pray for his strength and complete healing and for wisdom for the doctors as they decide what steps to take next.
7.29.2008
Continued Update
Please pray for his blood pressure to stabilize and for the nurses/doctors to help manage his pain.
Update from Amber again...
Please be praying for his full recovery.
Update from Amber
I will post more as soon as I hear back from my mother.
7.28.2008
Hanging In There
The procedure will begin at noon Tuesday. If everything goes as planned, Mike should be out of recovery and in his room by 3 p.m., going by how things have been before.
Please pray for Mike's safety, the procedure to go as comfortably as possible for Mike, that bleeding will be under control and to a minimum, and no further infection will develop.
Amber will blog an update. Thank you so much for your prayers.
"The angel of the Lord encamps around those who fear Him, and He delivers them. Taste and see that the Lord is good; blessed is the man who takes refuge in Him." Psalm 34:7-8
7.27.2008
The Power of Prayer
Mike's infection continues to be under control with the antibiotic. The fever is gone, but the jaundice is weakening Mike, causing him to be breathless when barely moving. His stomach also continues to be touchy, so eating has been a hit and miss effort. (His doctor appointment last Thursday showed Mike had dropped six pounds so I'm hoping he won't continue to lose anymore.) The medications are helping to keep his nausea, itching, and pain under better control, but they are also causing him to sleep quite a bit. Evenstill, we're feeling grateful, because we know your prayers are helping to allow Mike to have this procedure done at the best possible time, with the least amount of pain.
Lost in all of this, is the blessing that Mike's tumor was smaller on the scan Thursday, and that is such an answer to prayer!!! We are so amazed by God's mercifulness and the power prayer can have. We know we are where we are today, because of God's grace, and your faithfulness to pray for us. Thank you!
"The Lord is my strong fortress. The godly run to Him and are safe!" Proverbs 18:10
7.26.2008
Doing Better
Thank you for your continued prayers for him.
"The Lord is a strong fortress. The godly run to him and are safe." Proverbs 18:10
7.25.2008
Update
We would appreciate your continued prayers.
"The Lord is a strong fortress. The godly run to Him and are safe." Proverbs 18:10
Pray Against Infection
Because the procedure is so uncomfortable for Mike, he asked for a specific doctor, out of a team of doctors that usually does this at Baptist, and this doctor didn't have any time on his schedule until Tuesday. Mike called the doctor's assistant this morning, letting her know of his symptoms and his concern, and she told us Dr. Allen will be on call this weekend. So, if things get worse, we're to head to Baptist Hospital emergency room and ask for Dr. Allen.
They will initially go in and insert a tube in the right side of Mike's liver, allowing it to drain into a bag on his right side. Then they will keep him overnight to watch for any signs of infection. He will then be released, and they will allow the liver to decompress. Then in about a few days to a week, if everything is functioning well, he will be scheduled to return to the hospital and they will go in to the left side of his liver. The last time this was done, the doctor was able to go ahead and replace both stents at this time, without needing to put in another tube, or decompress that side of the liver. So after another overnight stay in the hospital, Mike was able to come home.
The major concern is infection, bleeding, and any complications with anesthesia. So please be praying God will protect Mike. Thank you so much.
"Fear not, for I am with you, be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my victorious right hand." Isaiah 41:10
7.24.2008
More Answered Prayer
We have received some more good news today! Mike's tumor, though not completely gone, has now reduced to .9 centimeters...which is slightly more than a 1/4 inch. (last time it measured 1.2 centimeters, just under 1/2 inch)
In Dr. Sneed's words, "This is an outrageously, remarkable response than I had anticipated when you first walked in here!" Obviously, God is working in our midst! Dr. Sneed isn't sure if what is showing up on the scan now, is tumor, or scar tissue, but for safe measures, he wants to continue with a couple of more treatments.
There was additional conversation about us returning to MD Anderson, to consult again about surgery. I guess the thought is, if it is tumor or scar tissue, it's better to have it completely gone, or out. Mike and I are a little confused why Dr. Sneed thinks the outcome of another consultation would be any different, than what it was in Dec/Jan., but we're willing to do whatever is best for Mike. Dr. Sneed didn't feel a surgical consult, at either Baptist or UAMS, would be helpful. Nothing was scheduled today, because we were interrupted with the return of Mike's lab report, so we're not really sure where this leaves us, on the trip to MD Anderson. (Added later: We see Dr. Sneed again next Thursday, July 31st.)
So, we were ready to go back to the treatment lab, to continue treatments today, when in the midst of the exam, Mike's labs were handed to Dr. Sneed, and we were told they were abnormal. (you can't be treated if your labs are not good) His bilirubin count was up to 5.1, indicating that his biliary stents are malfunctioning again. That could possibly explain why Mike has been feeling so bad this last week. Dr. Sneed also noticed Mike was a little jaundice. So we are now waiting to find out when Mike will be going into Baptist to have surgery to replace the stents in his liver. Dr. Sneed wanted it done tomorrow, or this weekend, but it's looking more like it will take place Monday. (We have now learned the surgery will be Tuesday, at 10 a.m. It will require an overnight stay. It is likely he will have tubes for a few days, and then will need to go back, and have the tubes surgically removed another day.)
Surgery, to replace the stents, isn't anything unexpected. We were told Mike would likely need them replaced within 5-7 months...and the last time he had them done was last January. But, it has been sort of a kick in the gut to Mike..because he was hoping to hear everything was gone today and the treatments were over. Also, because this procedure to replace the stents is so hard on him, he's pretty down, constantly facing getting this done. If another trip to MD Anderson, could get rid of Mike having to repeatedly get this procedure done, and lead him to be cancer free/treatment free, then it would be well worth it.
How you can pray:
First, praise God that the tumor continues to respond to treatment and that it is getting smaller. God is caring for us in such a way that even our own doctor is marveling at what is happening. Continue to pray that God will completely remove this tumor and restore Mike to full health.
Second, please remember Mike and I in your prayers over these next couple of days as we get these stents replaced and Mike to feeling better. The liver is such a delicate organ, that any kind of procedure to where this tumor is located, is very dangerous. Please pray the anesthesia will work well for Mike, and recovery will be easy. We won't know until we get in there, if Mike will have to come out of the hospital with tubes and bags for awhile, or if they will be able to do the replacement all at one time. But, if he comes out with tubes and bags, it is harder on both of us. So please pray that we will have the strength that will be necessary to get him back on his feet.
Thirdly, please pray that if another trip to MD Anderson could bring about a better solution to all of this, that everything will fall into place and we won't be making any unnecessary trips, wasting time, energy and money.
And lastly, please continue to pray for the special request I mentioned yesterday, concerning Mike's unemployment and insurance.
My heart is so overwhelmed when I think about your faithfulness to stand by our side in all of this. It is such a comfort to know we have so many friends and family who care about us and want the best for us. Thank you for being our support.
"Therefore humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you in due time, casting all your care upon Him, for He cares for you." 1 Peter 5:6-7
7.23.2008
Special Prayer Request
Mike is in bed sick today. He woke up this morning with his stomach upset, so he took some Phenagren and has slept a good part of the day. It has been a rough week for Mike, so I'm not surprised by his feeling bad today. He has felt pretty bad all week. It could be symptoms from his last treatment, or it could be he has been so anxious and concerned about these scan results, that this is what is causing the problem.
I have felt at peace up until now, but tomorrow morning is going to be really rough, waiting for our name to be called for Mike's appointment, and waiting for Dr. Sneed to walk into the room. I can't describe how difficult that moment is, every appointment day, but especially tomorrow.
Lab will be at 9 a.m. The appointment is at 10 a.m. I'm concerned about the results, but I'm more concerned about Mike's reaction, if the results are anything more than what he wants to hear. I know we can trust in God and your prayers to hold us up, to face this giant, and do what we need to do.
There is one more matter of prayer I'd like to ask of you. I can not give any specifics at the moment, but would really appreciate your prayers, concerning Mike's job situation, our health insurance, etc. Please pray for God to provide the best way to take care of this, and open doors only He can.
God has been so good to us and has blessed us beyond measure. We are so grateful to Him for resolving our son and daughter-in-law's situation, with a job here locally. Mike and I can not thank you enough for faithfully staying on your knees for our family.
"If you can believe, all things are possible to him who believes." Mark 9:23
7.22.2008
Overwhelmingly Grateful!
"Thanks be to God, who gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ." 1 Corinthians 15:57
7.20.2008
7.19.2008
Thank you for praying for our family.
"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." Phillipians 4:6-7
7.17.2008
We won't receive any results most likely until next Thursday. If Dr. Sneed decided to order a PET scan, in the case that the tumor wasn't seen on the CT anymore, it's more likely he would see Mike first, then order the scan for another day.
The anxiety of waiting, and wondering, is already getting to Mike, so this is going to be a LONG week. I'm a little worried Mike is looking for the above results, and is already hoping not to have anymore chemotherapy. I'm just trusting God will give us the strength to deal with whatever outcome we receive.
I'm comforted, knowing so many of you are keeping us in your thoughts and prayers. Thank you. I will keep you updated as soon as we learn anything new.
"He gives power to the tired and worn out, and strength to the weak." Isaiah 40:29
7.16.2008
7.15.2008
Mike is feeling better and he isn't as down as he was yesterday. He spent this morning devising a plan to network with his professional friends, and resolved some disability issues that have kept his stomach in knots for a few days. This past weekend, and yesterday, he was in somewhat of a tailspin.
There has been so much to adjust to. We are doing our best, coping with everything coming our way, trying to have a positive testimony, and keeping everyone informed. Unfortunately, some days knock us off our feet, and yesterday was one of them. Thank you for your understanding, your continued prayers and encouragement.
Mike's part time job will be from 4-7 p.m.-Monday thru Friday's, so that will leave his days open for doctor appointments, treatments, etc., and when that becomes familiar to him, it should help give him purpose to his days and make time pass a little easier.
Tomorrow we head to Little Rock for the CT. We plan to treat ourselves to lunch after the scan, and then hope to have a little fun shopping for Drew's birthday present, if Mike doesn't wear out too quickly.
Please remember us in your prayers. We don't expect to hear anything until Mike's appointment with Dr. Sneed, July 24th. But there was talk a few weeks ago, if the CT returned showing no tumor, a PET scan might be ordered to double-check for any signs of cancer.
Thank you for carrying us with your prayers and we will continue to keep you updated.
"I called to the Lord in my distress, and I cried to my God for help. From His temple He heard my voice, and my cry to Him reached His ears." Psalm 18:6
7.14.2008
It's a difficult week. I'm struggling knowing what to say, or even how to ask you to pray for us. The weight of everything is just feeling a little heavy. Please continue to remember us in your prayers.
"My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me." 2 Corinthians 12:9
7.13.2008
Please pray for extra strength and grace to get over this bump in the road. Thank You.
"O Lord, you are my light! You make my darkness bright." 2 Samuel 22:29
7.11.2008
Anniversary Week
Sunday marks the one year anniversary when this journey began. It's hard to look back, but it's such a blessing to see all God has carried us through. It's kind of ironic Mike's next CT scan is taking place this same week. The scan is weighing a little heavily on our minds. We want to be hopeful, without getting our expectations too high. Waiting the eight days, to learn the results, won't be easy. We would appreciate your prayers in this area.
Mike's job with Goody's ended formally yesterday, although he is committed through August 9th in tidying things up for them here. It's been a little sad for Mike, but he's very grateful for the almost 8 years he had with them. They were very good to us, especially this past year during Mike's illness.
We are still trying to work things out as far as Mike working part-time, Mike's disability, and carrying the COBRA medical insurance. There have been some problems with getting all of this set up, in such a way, so we don't have a lot of worry and concern. We learned recently that beginning in August, Mike is only going to be able to keep 1/2 of whatever income he brings in part-time. The disability insurance company plans to keep the other half. That isn't quite working out like we had hoped, so we're looking into other possible solutions and would appreciate your prayers in our making the best decisions.
Our son, Matt, was offered the job in NW Arkansas today. He has a week to make his decision. Matt is praying he'll be offered a position with ANO, and hopefully before he has to give his decision to the other company. He would really like to remain in this area so he and his wife can continue building their home. Matt is grateful though, that he has received at least one offer. Please continue to pray God will work out all of the details, and that Matt, Jill and Drew can have some peace of mind.
Thank you for your concern, compassion, and constant prayers. Your support has made this a less lonely journey.
"That Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith; that you, being rooted and grounded in love, may be able to comprehend with all the saints what is the width and length and depth and height--to know the love of Christ which passes knowledge; that you may be filled with all the fullness of God." Ephesians 3:17-19
7.09.2008
The other position, that he went to Nashville for, is undetermined still. Matt was led to believe that trip was only a formality in receiving the offer, but Matt met with two men up there, and took a physical and drug test before returning home. He was told he should hear about a decision within a week.
Thank you so much for praying for Matt, and for Mike's mom, Cecile. We spoke again with mom last night, and she is feeling so much better.
Mike is feeling much better today physically. The side effects from the chemo have finally tapered off, and he's back to feeling his "new normal", as he calls it. Thank you for keeping us lifted by your prayers.
"Let your roots grow down into Him and draw up nourishment from Him. See that you go on growing in the Lord, and become strong and vigorous in the truth you were taught. Let your lives overflow with joy and thanksgiving for all He has done." Colossians 2:7
7.08.2008
First off, Matt is in Nashville in his interview. We learned he is exhausted from being awake most of last night with heartburn and stomach trouble. So he's in the interview feeling completely drained. Please pray for his safety in returning home. He is driving.
Please also pray that God will help Matt rest between the time he gets home, and 8 a.m. tomorrow morning, when he has his interview with ANO. Please pray he will be both mentally and physically alert. Please pray that peace will be over Matt, Jill's and Drew's home this evening.
Mike is slowly rounding a corner and doing a little better. His energy level is really low right now, but it generally is, at this point after a treatment. We're hoping the next day or two will be better for him.
Mike's CT scan has been scheduled for Wednesday, July 16th, in LR. We won't be receiving any results until his appointment with Dr. Sneed, July 24th.
Every scan is difficult, waiting for the results, but this next one is going to be more than difficult. We have had the last two scans indicate shrinkage; by half, each time. So there are expectations. Mike wants the tumor GONE! Also, Mike is growing weary of all of the treatments, and the side effects from those. He's willing to continue on with treatment, but it would be easier with an end in sight.
We know we don't have to say, we need everyone on their knees for the results from this next CT. We truly need and want a miracle! Thank you for trusting God with us, for this result. Thank you for asking God, for the strength we're going to need, to sit that week out waiting, and in those moments in the doctor's office, hearing what the results are. Please pray God will prepare our hearts to accept whatever His will is for our life, and His perfect peace will quiet our hearts and give us hope.
"Fear not, for I am with you, be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my victorious right hand." Isaiah 41:10
7.06.2008
Please pray for Mike this week, that he will feel well enough to finish up his job with Goody's Distribution. It's going to be difficult for him. Also, please pray for the adjustment to his new part-time job, when that begins. He is grateful for the position, but like everything new, there's adjustment.
We called and spoke with Mike's mom, Cecile, today. She is doing so much better. She is still taking the antibiotics, so we pray this bout with Pnuemonia will be finished soon. Thank you so much for praying for her. It was hard seeing Mike so worried for his mom. I'm so grateful she is making improvement and things are looking better for her.
Matt is preparing to leave tomorrow for Nashville for his "formal" interview for the job in NW Arkansas. Please pray for his safety and peace of mind as he interviews. Then on Wednesday he will have his interview with ANO at 8 a.m. Please pray that he will communicate his desire for this position well, and that he will be able to discern God's will for him and his family.
The kids have really had a lot to deal with in their own lives, as well as along with their dad being sick. It hurts them so much to see their dad this way, not being able to do anything to help him feel better, and feeling so helpless. Emotionally, I think they are exhausted, and I believe it's beginning to weigh on them more heavily than they would probably admit. I know Matt, especially, has had so much to deal with. I'm more worried for him. Please pray God's peace will flood the kids hearts and minds, and that Mike and I can do all we can to lift their burden, and support them and their families as best as we can.
Thank you for your continued prayers and support. Where would we be without you to lean on? We truly are grateful.
"Fear not, for I am with you, be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my victorious right hand." Isaiah 41:10
7.05.2008
A Better Day
Yesterday evening, the kids and the grandkids were over, and Mike soared on the adrenaline of seeing them. The grandkids are always the best form of medicine for Mike. We had a nice Fourth of July together, with the kids preparing most of the food. Matt bought a few fireworks to celebrate the holiday, but Ethan wore out before dark, and Drew was terrified after the first sparkler. So grandma and Drew watched fireworks on TV, which is about as close as Drew wanted to get!
Thank you for continuing to think about our family and praying for us.
"And now, just as you trusted Christ to save you, trust Him, too, for each day's problems; live in vital union with Him." Colossians 2:6
7.04.2008
Mike's Mom is Improving
Mike's mom, Cecile, walked down to the nursing home dining room today, which was WONDERFUL to see, because it shows she's improving. The antibiotic seems to be helping her Pnuemonia and so are your prayers. Thank you.
7.03.2008
Dr. Sneed wants to schedule the CT scan for 3-4 weeks. We don't have the date yet. There was discussion about "the plan" after this next CT. Dr. Sneed wants to spread out Mike's chemo treatments and CT scans, to every four weeks for treatment and every 6 months for CT scans...but Mike doesn't like that idea and wants to remain aggressive. They left it at, they'll discuss things further after this next scan.
Dr. Sneed is trying to give Mike a better quality of life and protect his limbs from permanent Neuropathy damage. Mike feels he's handling everything fine, and doesn't want to do anything but go after this tumor aggressively. I guess we'll see who wins this argument when the results return.
Mike began feeling pretty bad when we got home from the doctors office. His face is flushed with a reddish tone, but he's not running any fever. His stomach is feeling "off" again and he's pretty weak. He came home and slept for a couple of hours and hasn't been able to do much but sit in the recliner since.
Mike's mom doesn't seem to be improving yet, so we would appreciate your continued prayers for her. Also, please pray Mike will get through these next couple of days as comfortably as possible, and that he won't pick up any viruses.
Thank you so much for keeping our family in your thoughts and prayers. Please trust God with us that we may get our miracle in a few weeks, when the scan results come in. Mike's hopeful for it being completely gone. July 13th will mark the one year anniversary for us, when this challenge began.
"Glorify the Lord with me; let us exalt his name together. I sought the Lord, and he answered me; he delivered me from all my fears." Psalm 34:3-4
7.02.2008
We see the oncologist tomorrow morning and then Mike will get his Neulasta injection. We're expecting to schedule the CT scan date tomorrow.
Right now, Mike is feeling the normal jitters following a treatment, and the usual weakness/nausea in his stomach. He came home and slept for a good two hours and has woke up feeling a little better.
While Mike was taking his treatment, I went to visit his mom. She is definitely uncomfortable on her left side, which seems to be the side the Pnuemonia is in. They have put her on a stronger antibiotic so we're hoping she'll begin to feel better soon. They are also giving her a little pain medication because she's sore from coughing the past week. We're a little concerned because she isn't getting up and moving. I spoke with the RN on duty, and she didn't act like there was any concern and just told me she felt the antibiotic would help. So we would appreciate your continued prayers for her.
"Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us." Ephesians 3:20
7.01.2008
Mike learned yesterday Goody's Russellville Distribution Center will completely close their doors July 11th. We are tremendously blessed for God providing a part time position for Mike, especially before Goody’s doors actually close. In fact, he stopped by the new job yesterday just to say hi and to thank them for the opportunity.
As Goody's comes to a close, Mike is beginning to feel a little down, saying goodbye to friends there, and saying goodbye to a "normal" way of working for awhile. This isn’t Mike’s first layoff, but it is his first having cancer, and not being strong enough to go out and get another full time job. Mike is strong and will get through all of this, but I wanted to ask you to join me in praying that his heart will stay encouraged and hopeful.
Our blog was mainly set up to keep family and friends updated on Mike's health and to help them know how to pray for him and our family. But a blog, can have a wide audience, and there have been a few things taking place simultaneously with Mike's health problems, that I haven't felt as free to share with a world wide audience. A couple of those issues, have been some health issues of my own, and some legal matters I've been dealing with since my dad passed away last August. Neither one of these issues deserves too much attention on this blog. But last night, as Mike and I were feeling deeply grateful for God answering prayer in these small issues, I couldn't help but wonder, maybe I was denying full praise to Him.
God has shown His mercy to us, time and time again, in areas blogged and unblogged. “He is the air that we breath and the ground beneath our feet.” He has sustained us with his mercy and grace, and your prayers have been paramount in supporting us. Thank you for loving us through all of this.
Tomorrow is "Chemo Day". So may every drop of those chemicals do a Mighty blessing in Mike's body!
"Blessed is he who has regard for the weak; FOR YOU, LORD, deliver him in times of trouble. You, Lord, will protect him and preserve his life; You will bless him in the land and not surrender him to the desire of his foes." Psalm 41:1-3