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In 2007, I began my original website, Sonshine's Haven. In 2007, it was turned into a blog and used to keep family updated on my first husband's fight with liver cancer. He passed away November of 2009. We were married for 34+ wonderful years and this journals some of that grief process I've gone through.
I have since remarried another widower, but Mike is missed dearly, and will always be a big part of my life.
At times, all of us will be called to act as witnesses to the suffering of another. We will be unable to affect the outcome physically. Words will fail us. Prayer will seem futile. And yet, the act of bearing witness to someone else's trials is a sacred sorrow that offers and astounding glimpse of eternal joy." by Ginger Garrett
"Being willing to stay with a loved one throughout their travail, can be difficult....YES! But offering yourselves as faithful companions on a dark and dreadful journey can be an unmeasured blessing." (paraphrased by me)
9.30.2008
Mike is Stabilized
On a grateful side, Mike has stabilized after enduring full abdominal surgery, after such a cardiac scare. He gained an additional drain today, but it will be taken out before we leave Houston. His pain is being managed by an Epidural and other pain medications, but the amazing thing is that he is very coherent and doing as good as can be expected. There are some other factors going on, in addition to what I'm sharing this evening, but I would rather get all the facts straight, before sharing further. I'm praying we'll have better understanding tomorrow.
Please forgive me for defaulting to an email my sister sent out to her friends concerning what occurred. I want you to have details, but I'm so exhausted and am struggling to think straight. I promise to update you tomorrow when my head is clearer. I just want you all to know how grateful I am for thinking about us and praying as you have been. It has kept me going today.
Love, Beverly
From Jaime:
"The surgeon came out to speak with us at 10 am. They had to stop the surgery because Mike's heart could not sustain an 8 hour surgery. His blood pressure dropped significantly once he was put under and they had to give him medicine to keep it up; however, this medicine is damaging to his intestines and could not be administered for the entire procedure. The surgeon had to remove a section of Mike's colon to reach the tumor in his liver. This had to be done because of so much scar tissue from the 2 prior cancer surgeries 28 years ago. Additionally, the surgeon discovered once they were in there that Mike had extensive damage to his liver, intestines and heart from the radiation treatments 28 years ago. This damage along with the scar tissue led to the surgery needing to be much more complicated and lengthy - and Mike would not have made it. The surgeon said it was not "humanly possible" to go forward with the surgery at this time. Mike will have to be in the hospital at least 5 days. There are no alternatives being offered at this time while he recovers. Mike and Bev are both very sad and disappointed with this outcome. Hopefully Mike will recover and we will be able to come up with an alternate solution."
Update as of 10:15 a.m.
Mike was taken back to surgery at 7 a.m. We will receive a report at 10 a.m.
9.29.2008
Surgery Schedule
Also, I forgot to mention that Mike's liver enzymes were better this trip than our last visit, so that was good news and seemed to be a big deal to the doctor. Also Mike's blood counts were very good.
To clarify the anesthesia Mike will be having; Mike will be given general anesthesia for the surgery itself, but at some point, they might decide to do an epidural on Mike to help manage his pain as he comes out from under general anesthesia.
Thank you for keeping us in your thoughts and prayers.
Surgery is a Go
Mike is in a little pain from his side (tubes) and his neuropathy this morning. He's figuring all the walking has contributed to that, plus he's been freezing from the air conditioning in the building. We're back in our room now and he's napping, so maybe he will feel better later.
We're so relieved to be heading in the right direction now. Thank you SO much for praying for us. Please keep Amber, Zac and Ethan and my sister, Jaime, in your prayers, as they head this way. Also please pray Matt, Jill and Drew will be comforted waiting on news about Mike, while they are back home.
"Let your roots grow down into Him and draw up nourishment from Him. See that you go on growing in the Lord, and become strong and vigorous in the truth you were taught. Let your lives overflow with joy and thanksgiving for all He has done." Colossians 2:7 TLB
9.28.2008
Arrived Safely
Mike and I just wanted to let everyone know we have arrived safely. Our flight was about 30 minutes delayed, but we had a perfect flight and made it safely to our hotel. We bypassed lunch earlier at the airport, so we just finished eating some dinner. Mike was on his way down to the lobby where there is a huge flatscreen TV so he could watch the football game. While down there, he noticed there was a lab where he could go ahead and get his bloodwork done early, saving us from having to wait tomorrow morning in a huge waiting room. So it looks like we're off to a better start than last time.
Mike is in such a positive state of mind and feeling so well today. I'm convinced it's because all of you are praying for us! He chatted all the way on our flight down his goals for how he'd like to see things go. I'm wanting to be in that same positive state of mind...but I don't think I'm quite where he's at. I figured I wouldn't unpack our suitcases until we get the "all is clear to go" sign. ;)
Thank you so much for following us with your prayers. I've spent the last few minutes alone praising God, for another opportunity to find help for us. We're just so grateful for another chance. We will update you when we get word. Our first appointment is at 7:15 a.m., and that should be the decision we're looking for.
Love,
Beverly
9.27.2008
Ready for Houston
He spent some time with the kids this morning as we took a family photo, wearing shirts displaying Mike's favorite football team....the Dallas Cowboys. Then he got as many grandbaby kisses he could store up for a couple of weeks. He also felt well enough to take a double-lap walk in the court. He's doing well and is eager to "get this show on the road."
We will keep you updated. Our first appointment is at 7:15 a.m. on Monday, and that will be the one to determine if surgery is a go.
Thank you for holding us in your hearts and praying.
"When I am at my weakest point, You are just beginning. When I know myself to be at the end of my strength, I know my Lord to be at the front of the battle. When I'm convinced I cannot go another step, You sweep me into Your mighty arms and carry me the rest of the way. Lord, I abide in Your marvelous grace. I lean on Your never-failing love." BJ Hoff
"Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace." Hebrews 4:16
9.26.2008
Truly Blessed
We would continue to appreciate your thoughts and prayers as we ready ourselves for leaving Sunday. I'm continuing to struggle with anxiousness, so prayer specifically addressed at that for me, would be a blessing.
Mike and I really want everyone to know how deeply you have touched our hearts by your reaching out, praying for us, and lending a hand in so many ways. We are truly blessed to have such dear family and friends. Thank you for caring so much about us. We will head to Houston knowing a huge support system is back here on their knees on our behalf. You can't begin to know how deeply that comforts Mike and I.
"My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is made perfect in weakness." 2 Corinthians 12:9
9.25.2008
You Have Done So Much For Us
Loose ends are coming together, and all that is really left to do, is repacking a few items. I'm beginning to feel a little jittery as things get closer. I don't know how I can want...and not want something...all at the same time. I guess my mind is a little unsettled. I'm trying to keep focused on God's word, remembering His power and strength, to keep me calm.
Your prayers mean everything to Mike and I. Thank you for being so caring, unselfish, and giving.
"Lord, you will do everything you have planned for me. Lord, your faithful love continues forever. You have done so much for us. Don't stop now." Psalm 138:8 (Amplified Bible)
Please note the beautiful song below.
9.24.2008
Blessing and Encouragement
So here's Mike's plan. He plans on not trying to call them anymore, and just not take his medication before the anesthesiology appointment Monday morning, to show them that his blood pressure is dropping so low, only after taking the heart medications, and we're praying once they see that, this won't be anything to them to cancel the surgery. That's been our largest concern; there to be another reason to cancel or postpone surgery.
I had a successful day gathering up medical supplies and prescriptions needed for the trip. There's just a lot to do to prepare for being gone awhile. I also went up to visit Mike' s mom to make sure she's doing well. She had been sick, so I convinced Mike not to go, to be on the safe side.
Matt will not be going for the surgery. He is working that week and we all agreed he needed to remain here. Amber & Zac, and Ethan will be driving as soon as we get completely cleared Monday for the surgery.
Thank you for continuing to pray for Mike to be infection free and for his appetite to stay up. We would also appreciate your prayers for everything to come together easily as we prepare to head back down to Houston. Please pray there will be no cancellations this go around. Please pray for God's guidance for the surgeons, as they rebuild Mike's biliary system and try to remove the remaining portion of the tumor. Please pray that we'll receive a good report and Mike will stay strong throughout the 5 hour procedure. And please pray for the children and I as we wait to learn Mike's alright. Your faithfulness in praying for us has been such a blessing and an encouragement to Mike and I.
"The Lord will perfect that which concerns me; Your mercy and loving-kindness, O Lord, endure forever--forsake not the works of Your own hands." Psalm 138:8
9.23.2008
A Strong Start
The blood pressure/heart issue is still puzzling. The first half of the day Mike's blood pressure was around 101/74, with a heart rate of 90. That was excellent! So he decided not to bother with trying to call the cardiologist again. But we may have celebrated too early. Later this afternoon, after we had ran up to Goody's, ran a couple of errands, and took a drive, he needed help with me driving back home because he became dizzy. Once home, we took his blood pressure and it was back down to 74/48, with a heart rate of 90. The only change, was him leaving the house and taking a pain pill. So, we may need to make another effort of getting a hold of his cardiologist before we head down for surgery. We figure this may be something a minor adjustment to his medications might improve.
We're going to continue trusting God for this surgery on Tuesday, and pray that these issues involving his heart can be easily cared for as well. Thank you for supporting us with your thoughts and prayers.
"His divine power has given us everything required for life and godliness. 2 Peter 1:3
9.22.2008
Waiting and Praying
We waited all day to hear from the cardiologist, but never did. It has been so frustrating at times dealing with doctors, especially those from MD Anderson. I know they are some of the best doctors in the world, but they haven't been very good at responding to our needs, or questions.
Mike and I are just praying that his low blood pressure, won't be a problem for the surgery next week. We have tried to explain to the cardiologist our concerns in an email, but either he doesn't think it's an issue, or he's out of pocket, and no telling when we'll be advised what to do. It may be something as simple as giving him saline solution before surgery. They did this the last time we were at MD Anderson, when he was having tests done on his heart and his blood pressure was low. But it certainly would be helpful to know this days before the scheduled surgery, if this was anything to be concerned about.
Please continue to pray everything will work out for Mike to have this surgery done.
"But my eyes look to You, Lord God. I seek refuge in You." Psalm 141:8
9.21.2008
Praising God
Mike is having quite a lot of difficulty with his dizziness though. We went to church this morning and three times Mike stood to sing, he had to sit back down, because the room was spinning. He spent the last half of the worship hour trying to think of a way to leave when the service was over without hitting the floor. He wasn't convinced he could make it back to the car. When the service ended, he practically bolted for the door, trying to get to the car as quickly as he could. We came home and he asked me to take his blood pressure. It was 74/48. That's pretty low. His heart rate was 94. He sent an email to his cardiologist at MD Anderson explaining his problem to see if he wants to adjust the medications. We still haven't heard anything back.
Well, a week from now, we will be in Houston again. I pray everything will stay on schedule as planned, and the surgery can take place successfully. It has been fairly exhausting staying at this heightened level of concern with these tubes in, and also now with this heart/blood pressure/heart rate problem. I'm trying to take every precaution possible, changing and flushing out Mike's biliary drains, but infection can happen so easily there and I don't think I could handle the guilt, if anything seriously got out of hand. I just need to get that pressure lifted off my shoulders soon. I pray it will be God's will for everything to work out perfectly September 30th.
All of you have been abundantly helpful and supportive to Mike and I, and the children. We are so grateful for you coming alongside us, and letting us lean on you for support.
"My Father, You are the Lord, My Holy One, My Creator, My King. You are the One who made a way through the sea, a path through mighty waters." Isaiah 43:15-16 Praying God's Word
9.20.2008
Grateful for a Good Day
Mike held off taking his pain medication until 4 p.m., because he thinks that is increasing the dizziness he's feeling, now that he's on the heart medication. We're going to try and go to church in the morning, if he wakes up without a fever, and if he's feeling a little better.
I'm just so grateful for a good day and pray we can have a few more. Thank you for praying for us so faithfully.
"He leads me beside quiet waters, He restores my soul." Psalm 23:2,3
9.19.2008
Fever Has Gone Back Up
We called the University of Texas police department this evening to make sure the letter we received today wasn't a scam of any sort. (see prior post) They verified a clerk who routinely handled Mike's paperwork, and 2 others, had retrieved personal information on them. The mistake she made was applying for a credit card under one patients name and listing her employer as MD Anderson. That is how they tracked her down. They confiscated her computer and other evidence from her home. We have put a fraud alert out to credit reporting agencies, and will apply for other measures of protection. We would appreciate your continued prayers concerning this.
Mike ate a good dinner this evening, so I'm very grateful his appetite was a little better tonight. I have to celebrate even the smallest answers to prayer because it reminds me God cares about the big and small things. Thank you for praying so specifically for us.
"Assuredly, I will set you free and care for you. Assuredly, I will intercede for you." Jeremiah 15:11
9.18.2008
Stolen Identity
Remember when I shared recently how Mike and I seem to feel like a magnet, attracting unbelievable circumstances to our already complicated situation? Well, we have a new story to share, and to also ask for your protection and prayer over.
We received a letter today from MD Anderson informing us that a former MD Anderson employee accessed 3 patients personal information, and has possibly stolen their identities. Mike is one of the patients. Unbelievable!
An audit was done, and they have obtained evidence indicating Mike's information was inappropriately used. The matter is being turned over to The University of Texas Police Department and has also been referred to the Harris County District Attorney's Office for possible criminal action. MD Anderson is doing what they can to help safeguard us, but goodness, we didn't need this on top of everything else! Please pray with us for God's protection over every aspect of our life, family and personal information, and that we will also have the knowledge and understanding necessary, to protect ourselves further.
"God gives us STRENGTH that we may be Servants, God gives us HOPE that we may be Encourager's, God gives us COMPASSION that we may be Comforters, God gives us JESUS that we may be Family." BJ Hoff
The Antibiotic is Working
Mike seems to be feeling better today. He is still having trouble with dizziness, and the Levaquin can cause that too, so he's needing to stand slowly, and get his bearings before walking. Sunlight seems to heighten his dizziness, causing his vision to become blurred, and sometimes reaching a point where everything goes black. So, I try to stay close by, or make sure someone else is with Mike when I can't be. I think we will need to further discuss these symptoms with the cardiologist in Houston when we're there. His heart medication may need a little adjustment. I pray none of this will impede the surgery.
Thank you for your emails, phone calls, and cards this week. You have lifted our hearts, encouraged us, and reminded us that we're not in this alone. Some days can be more challenging than others, and we tend to forget God is in control, when things turn out differently than we wanted. But we quickly come back to God's Faithfulness, His Presence and Strength, and His Goodness and Mercy. He IS answering prayer. But His TIMING isn't always our timing, and we need to lean back and trust Him. Mike and I will continue to lean on Him, to restore Mike to full health, but thank you for allowing us to lean on you too, to keep us propped up when the road becomes a little long and wearisome! ;) Your prayers carry us farther than you could ever know, and we're SO grateful for each and every one of you.
"You will keep in perfect peace him whose mind is steadfast, because he trusts in You." Isaiah 26:3
9.17.2008
Infection Has Developed
Thank you for covering us with your thoughts and prayers.
"For I know the plans I have for you, "declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11
9.16.2008
Rescheduled
Please pray Mike will stay healthy these next couple of weeks. I found blood coming from one of Mike's tubes yesterday morning while we were in Mesquite. It alarmed me, but Mike wasn't concerned. Possibly all the jostling around from the road trip caused it. Today he is doing fine. I'm just so ready to have this problem fixed. Having it drag on for weeks is grueling and tiresome. And seeing an answer so close, yet so far away, is wearing on me. I guess I'm growing impatient. So I suppose that would be something you could pray for me about.
Mike and I truly appreciate your thoughts, prayers and support. You have not allowed us to be alone in any of this, and that has been a huge comfort, and has lightened the load. I honestly don't know where we would be without all of your love and support. Thank you!
"For I know the plans I have for you, "declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11
9.15.2008
Home
I packed the car and tried to call MD Anderson a few times myself, finally getting through to an operator. She flatly told Mike the clinic was closed and everything scheduled, would be cancelled and rescheduled for another time. When Mike tried to explain what the surgeon's assistant had been telling us, he was told it was incorrect information. So, we sat there still trying to figure out what to do. I told Mike I felt we needed to check and see if the Rotary House was opening, and if it was, I felt we just needed to head to Houston and stay there until surgery could be done. So Mike called the Rotary House and reached someone who told him that they would be closed for the rest of the week. We knew the only thing we could do then, was to come home.
As I was driving home, Mike was awakened by two phone calls. One around Texarkana, from the Rotary House, wondering if we were coming in today. (Yep....someone, once again, gave us wrong information.) Then another call came in around Arkadelphia, from MD Anderson telling us to skip the preparation for the surgery this afternoon, that they had cancelled the procedure. (A little delayed)
Mike and I don't understand why so much confusion and trouble is going on to get this procedure done. We have tried so hard to be there when they've asked us to be, and we understand that there have been circumstances there, that have been out of their control. It's just been a difficult journey and we're trying to understand the lesson in all of it. For now, we'll just need to sit and wait for Houston to get back on their feet, and for the surgery to get rescheduled.
"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him." Romans 8:28
9.14.2008
Discouraging Day
We have received a couple of more text messages this afternoon from the surgeon's assistant, suggesting that we continue to head down to Houston for a possibility of still having surgery. Our concern has been where we would stay. So, as things stand this evening, we are going to wait and see what the morning brings. We have heard the clinic will be opened tomorrow for "limited patients." We don't know if we qualify as "limited patients", or if anyone will even answer the phone, but we will try to get a few questions answered before making another move. We called the Rotary House this evening and were told to call back in the morning.
I guess tonight, Mike and I would ask that you would pray we can find God's peace in the midst of all this uncertainity and dissappointment, and that we can find the clearest direction to head in tomorrow.
More Delays
Thank you for your continued prayers.
9.13.2008
Thank You!
Thank you very much for keeping Mike, myself and the children in your prayers. We will be heading out in the morning making our way to MD Anderson. We know many of you are worried that we're going to run into trouble along the way, but we are doing our best at calling the right people and getting clearances for our journey there. We plan to take all interstate, even though it is a little longer of a trip. But we're thinking that may be the smartest route this soon following the hurricane. We've called the metro police station in Houston and explained our situation and were told we'd have no problem. We're trusting God that if we do run into any trouble, He will help us find solutions.
We also want each of you to know we have been truly blessed by the ways you've reached out to us, helping to see us through all of this. Mike and I are speechless by your demonstrations of love and support. Thank you from the bottom of our hearts.
We will be sure to keep you up to date about our journey down, and especially once we arrive. We're praying with all of our heart that everything is safe to proceed with the surgery and there will be no major obstacles in our way.
Love,
Mike and Beverly
"Lord...Your love is the branch of hope we cling to. In the rising tide, in the restless wind, in the gathering storm, you are our peace." BJ Hoff
Updated Saturday at Noon
"Dear Mr. McSheehy,As of now, we are still operational on Monday. MDA has electricity, but there is some flooding the area. For now, I would plan on coming to Houston as scheduled. I may not be in the hospital on Monday though. I will also have limited access to my MDA email.Take care,Steve"
We were called late last night and told our flight to Houston has been cancelled for tomorrow. So far, MD Anderson still has us scheduled for an appointment Monday and admission Tuesday. We'll wait and see what more we learn today. If we drive, we will likely leave early Sunday to try and make our way down.
Mike's blood pressure has been very low the last couple of days....and yesterday his heart rate was back up to 104 beats per minute, which troubled us a little. Later when we took it, it was back down to 91 which made us relax. This could explain why he felt so bad yesterday.
Please continue praying for our family's protection. Drew has a bacterial infection and is on an antibiotic, and Amber was running a little fever and didn't feel well yesterday. Matt plans to fly to TX Monday, and Zac, Amber and the baby are planning on driving down Monday. We're dealing with so much stress right now. Thank you for your continued prayers.
9.12.2008
What to Do?
Mike is a little "off" today. He tells me he is achy and a little weaker. We ran up to visit his mom in the nursing home, because today is her 90th birthday. I forced Mike to wear a mask to try and protect him from any germs, so he wasn't a happy camper. But at least we were able to spend a few minutes with her. She is still confined to her bed after the fall she had two weeks ago. We're home now, so he can rest.
Please continue to pray and trust God with us, that we will find a safe way to get to Houston on time, and that surgery this Tuesday is God's will for Mike and I. It has been such a challenging journey for us, that at times, we've questioned why are we constantly up against something? The only peace and comfort our hearts can be sure of, is when we read what Gods word tell us..................................
"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11
9.11.2008
Update From MD Anderson
Welcome MICHAEL MCSHEEHY
Thursday, September 11, 2008
09/11/2008
Weather Closure - Due to Hurricane Ike, M. D. Anderson Cancer Center will be closed for outpatient clinic appointments and surgeries, Friday, Sept. 12.
M. D. Anderson’s hospital remains open, caring for patients who are admitted or who have had surgery. Families of hospitalized patients are urged to stay safe and remain at home during the storm.
09/11/2008
Your next appointment is scheduled for Monday, September 15, 2008 at 8:15 AM
Thank you for keeping us in prayer, and trusting God with us, for this opportunity.
Mike is feeling well today. He had me take him up to Goody's for a little while today to check on their progress of taking down racks and conveyors, and then we went up to Walmart to pick up a few things for our next trip down to Houston. So he was up and moving around pretty good. He tuckered out when he came home though, and took a nap. We checked his heartrate last night and our blood pressure cuff has his resting heart rate at 94. I think doctors in Houston were wanting it down to about 85, but at least it's not 108+ ! He is being able to hold off taking any pain medication until about 2-3 p.m. That's about the time the tugging on his tubes begins to drive him nuts and hurt. So he is making progress and hopefully we can get these tubes out of him soon.
"For I know the plans I have for you, " declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11
9.10.2008
Prayer Request
For one reason or another, surgery for Mike has either been postponed or cancelled in the past few months. We really need a miracle for everything to work out for Mike and I to get back into Houston, and for MD Anderson to be open for surgery Tuesday. Time really isn't on our side... number one, because of Mike being off chemo for two months already. Number two, the tubes are such a risk for blockage or infection. I just don't know if Mike and I can handle another cancellation.
Please pray with us that things will work out to keep our plans, and for surgery to proceed. We're so close to seeing the prize and we want it so badly.
Thank you. Please enjoy the song below.
Slow Me Down, Lord!
I began to blog an update last night, but in the midst of it, I was struggling to stay awake. I made a couple of big mistakes over the past couple of days. One yesterday, was when we got to the airport in Houston yesterday at 6 a.m. I was rushing around loading the car, returning the rental car, and getting luggage checked in, when I surprised myself by remembering to take my Dramamine on time...before the flight! :) Only problem was, it wasn't Dramamine that I popped into my mouth. As I was swallowing the two pills, it occurred to me the two white pills were oval, not round. I had pulled them from a generic pill box I keep in my purse, which doesn't have the pills labeled. I saw white, and popped them in quickly. So anyway...I'm continuing on through the airport thinking uh oh! What did I just take, and how is it going to affect me? I was trying to figure it out before I mentioned anything to Mike. Well, eventually I figured out I had taken some anti-anxiety medication (Xanax) given to me to help me sleep at nights. I sleep very well with one! :) I figured I better skip the Dramamine at this point to have half a chance of walking on and off the plane! :) Of course, when I told Mike about what I had done, he gave me a hard time all the way home, and after. He also has another story to tell at some point, of another mistake I made, that I won't bore you with right now.
Mike is doing good. He handled the trip home fairly well. He was sore, of course, but being home is doing him a world of good. He got to see Drew, but at a distance. Drew is sick. So has been Drew's daddy actually. So we're having to keep Mike at arms distance. Mike still loved seeing Drew though, and hearing all of his new learned words, songs, etc. Ethan was also over and just kept staring at Mike in the beginning. We're guessing Mike's new incoming hair and beard is throwing Ethan a little. But Ethan got to chuckling a couple of times when Mike was making faces and noises at him, so he's warming up to him. Of course, Mike isn't allowed to hold anything more than 10 pounds for 10 days, so Ethan has been sort of off limits too.
Time is just passing too quickly right now. We want more than ever to stay here...yet we also want this surgery over too. Our trips to MD Anderson have been so unpredictable, so we're having to be so guarded to protect our hearts from disappointments. Our trips also keep giving us other challenges too....like two hurricanes, troubles with rental car agencies, etc. Some days it just feels like we're magnets, attracting trouble. :) But when we stop feeling sorry for ourselves, we realize how very fortunate we are, and how blessed we are to have so many people loving and caring about us. God is teaching us so much through everything we're going through, and we pray He is also helping others through our situation. Regardless of what is happening....God is faithful and good!
How you can be praying.......
1. For God to protect Mike from catching anything before this surgery takes place...and after (virus, infections, etc.)
2. That our next trip to MD Anderson has no diversions and we can take care of everything we need to for Mike to be healthy.
3. That I will experience God's strength and peace when it's needed the most....and maybe to also take an extra breath before popping pills into my mouth so quickly. ;)
4. That our home, children, grandchildren, and pets, will be safe and protected while we're apart from each other.
Thank you for caring so deeply about us and wanting to help in so many ways. You are such a blessing to us and we're so grateful for each one of you!
"Some trust in chariots and some in horses, but I trust in the name of You, The Lord My God! My enemy will be brought to his knees and ultimately fall, but I will rise up and stand firm." (Psalm 20:7,8 Praying God's Word)
9.08.2008
Retreat and Regroup
To try and explain...
The cardiologist's at MD Anderson felt Mike was a cardiac risk for surgery, so surgery was cancelled. So they ran a few tests to confirm this, and to find the extent the "damage" was. They had a report in their hands from a doctor back home which told them the back side of Mike's heart was "dead", and from the information we gave them about Mike's last procedure in Little Rock, where he experienced Re-Expansive Pulmonary Edema, they determined Mike had experienced heart failure and had Congestive Heart Failure.
The new medication they started Mike on down here, was to help reverse any damage to his heart, to slow the damage down, and to keep the heart from overworking itself. The tests they ran, showed no "dead" damage to the back of Mike's heart. The report from AR was incorrect.
But tests here, did show a blockage (60-70%). This was after two less than perfect attempts to CT scan Mike's heart. The cardiologist from MD Anderson assumed the blockage was from past cancer treatments. But what we learned today from the catherization, and from a different cardiologist at a different hospital, is that the CT of the heart done at MD Anderson last week, exaggerated this blockage on the scan. The cardiologist today felt it was a normal plaque residue, and could better be treated with cholesterol lowering medication, but because of Mike's liver situation, nothing is being done for now. Being the blockage was only about 50%, to keep Mike on target for surgery, doing anything through the catherization today (for examples balloon procedure or medicated stints) would have been too invasive, would have kept Mike in the other hospital at least a night, and would have delayed the surgery further. Mike will have to wait on taking this medication until his liver is repaired.
The final report from the cardiologist at MD Anderson today read..........."This would be good for you to go home and rest. I did review everything from your catherization and everything is set for your surgery. Please continue on your medications as this will lower your operative risk for a cardiac event." .............hmmmm, all of this for this much reassurance.
So........we are heading home to rest. We're trusting everything will continue to proceed safely, for surgery on the 16th, and we would covet your prayers. Our plans are to return to MD Anderson Sunday.
"My brethren, count it all joy when you fall into various trials." James 1:2
Procedure finished
My dad's procedure is finished. It was painful for him because they couldn't sedate him much because his blood pressure was low, and they didn't clear the blockage. Mom's understanding was that they were only checking to see if he was ok for surgery and the blockage will be treated with medication. The heart hospital has cleared him for surgery, but we are waiting to see if it will be tomorrow or the week after.
I'll keep you updated. Thank you for your prayers for my family.
9.07.2008
Familiar Faces and Supportive Friends
One of the few blessings we've had being in Texas these past few weeks, is having dear friends go out of their way to meet up with us, whom we haven't seen in a long while. Jeff Zimmerman use to work with Mike in Russellville, and now, he and his wife, Lisa, live and work in Houston. They met with us the first weekend we were here, took us sightseeing (okay...we got lost, but discovered some pretty neat places in downtown Houston) and to dinner. We really enjoyed our time with them.
We then met with some new friends of ours, who are close friends of my sister and her husband, who also live here in Houston, but who have been lovingly watching over us. Howard and Toni have been such a blessing! They have been helpful getting us to and from the airport, treated us to dinner, and have done anything and everything they can to help.
Today, friends of ours from Plano, TX (above), where Mike and I use to live before we moved to AR, drove down for a visit, and took us to lunch. They were such a sight for sore eyes! Hannah is now a Junior in High School. When we lived in Plano, Hannah was an infant, and our family cared for her part-time. Our families quickly became family, more than friends. What a lovely woman Hannah has grown into being! Mike and I were truly blessed seeing Pam and Hannah today, and appreciated them driving so far out of their way to be with us.
Meeting up with familiar faces, and supportive friends, have helped make this trip less lonely. Laughter has taken our minds off of the seriousness of our situation, and memories have comforted us.
As you can imagine, tomorrow is a big day for us. It has been a challenge for Mike and I this weekend, keeping our emotions in check. Desperation and fear, have had us ready to charge ahead, and retreat, all at the same time. The unknown can be so overwhelming. The only way we have been able to keep pressing on, is reminding ourselves that God is Lord over everything in our lives, and He is in control. Yielding to His will, and His timing, releases us from the struggle that some times wants to rise up and overtake us.
We did one more run by of the hospital where we need to be tomorrow. This time we located the right building, and right parking area, so we should show up in the right place tomorrow morning. :)
Please keep us in your prayers tomorrow.
"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." Philippians 4:6-7
9.06.2008
The Journey
I'm sure it goes without saying, Mike and I really need this procedure to be successful and to go smoothly. We have such a limited amount of time to solve this issue so that conditions will be optimum for removing the tumor. Mike has been off chemotherapy now since July 2, and our planned stay keeps changing and growing longer. Everything just becomes a little more complicated as time drags on and delays keep happening.
Please pray for Mike's health to be protected, for this procedure to go smoothly, and for it to be successful. Please pray for peace as I wait to know how Mike is doing. And please pray for peace over our home, and our children, as they wait as well, back home. The past few weeks, especially, have been incredibly stressful for everyone, and we just need an extra touch of mercy and grace to keep going.
We are so grateful for all the help we're receiving, and we know we're in the best possible hands. It's just that the journey has been long and we're growing a little weary from the walk. Thank you for remembering us in your thoughts and prayers. We love all of you!
"He giveth power to the faint; and to them that have no might He increaseth strength." Isaiah 40:29
9.05.2008
Procedure
P.S. One bit of excitement Mike and I had yesterday, was riding alone in the elevator with Gerald McRaney, formerly from the TV program "Major Dad". He was here speaking at a conference, being a former patient of MD Anderson, for Lung Cancer.
My parents were all packed and ready to come home this morning till they got the call that my dad is having a heart catheterization sometime today to clear a blockage in one of his valves. It's about 60-70% blocked (if I remember correctly) and sometimes they can clear that sort of blockage with medication only, but since they are trying to get him into surgery this coming Tuesday, they decided to clear the blockage with the heart catheterization. My dad is reassuring me it isn't "serious", but please pray for his safety and for the doctors as they perform this procedure.
As for now we are all making tentative plans to make our way to Houston for surgery this Tuesday. Since plans keep changing so frequently as of late, we will keep you updated should things change.
Thank you for your prayers.
9.04.2008
Sit and Wait Some More
In the lab, they gave him oral medication to try and get the heart rate down. The first pill got it down to 81 beats per minute, but it also lowered Mike's blood pressure, so they had to put an IV in, to give Mike saline solution to help with that. So then they gave Mike another round of oral medication, but the heart rate remained the same. So they decided they would go ahead with the test at 81 beats per minute. Just walking to the table for the CT, raised Mike's heart rate to 86 again, so they had to give him an injection of the medication they had been giving to him in pill form. I guess they either gave up, or decided to go with what they had, because Mike came out an hour later saying they got their pictures. Praise God! Now we just pray the pictures show only good news.
We're in a wait and see mode this evening. We haven't been told anything by the cardiologist yet, about the results of today's test, or clearance for surgery, but we have been told by the surgeon's assistant, to remain in Houston until tomorrow morning, because surgery could still be a go for Tuesday. So....we sit and wait some more. :)
Thank you so much for praying for us and reminding us that we're in your thoughts. It helps us not to feel alone in all of this. We really are very grateful for the care we're getting here. It can just get frustrating at times, adapting to their process of doing things, and then being so far away from home and family. We would appreciate your continued prayers as we wait, or prepare for surgery.
"The Lord is my constant companion. There is no need that He cannot fulfill. Whether His course for me points to the mountaintops of glorious joy or to the valleys of human suffering, He is by my side. He is ever present with me. He is close beside me when I tread the dark streets of danger, and even when I flirt with death itself, He will not leave me. When the pain is severe, He is near to comfort. When the burden is heavy, He is there to lean upon. When depression darkens my soul, He touches me with eternal joy. When I feel empty and alone, He fills the aching vacuum with His power. My security is in His promise to be near me always and in the knowledge that He will never let me go." Psalms/Now-Psalm 23
9.03.2008
Power Equal to my Tasks
Last night, after we learned the CT of the heart couldn't be done, the cardiologist changed some of Mike's heart medications. This is resulting in Mike having even more difficulty standing and his vision is tremendously blurred. We are hoping this is only a temporary measure to get this test accomplished. We are set to give this CT of the heart another try tomorrow at 10:40, but Mike is already dreading it. He has lost confidence in the CT department, and the process, and he is becoming a little down, fearing things will go wrong again. Also, probably a minor issue, but Mike continues to drop weight here, dropping another 6 pounds...due to the fasting for tests.
It is necessary for Mike to have this test done to be cleared for surgery. I would appreciate your prayers for Mike's heart rate and blood pressure to be the right range, to accomplish this test being done. Please pray for God to quiet Mike's spirit, relaxing him to do whatever is necessary to move pass this hurdle and get on with the surgery. That nothing serious would be found by the CT to delay the surgery. There was talk last Friday that if there is any blockage, for example scar tissue from previous treatments, one way they would rectify that, would be to do a heart catherization to repair it. Of course, that would delay the surgery even more. So please trust God with me that the CT will show everything to be in good shape to proceed.
There is a slim possibility surgery could happen Tuesday, Sep. 9th, but it is doubtful. The surgeon already has a 2 hour procedure scheduled for that day, and with Mike's procedure set to take about 5 hours, it's unclear whether the surgeon would be willing to do both. But it is being discussed, and if the results return quickly from the CT of the heart, then it might be possible. If so, we would not return home this weekend.
The surgery is definitely scheduled to take place Tuesday, Sep. 16th, if not before. Mike would need to be assessed once again, the Monday prior, by the anethesiologist. So hopefully he will successfully pass this next time. This would mean we would return home this weekend, then return to Houston Sunday, Sep. 14th.
So, that is where we are at for now. I guess the best way you could pray for us is that we would have the strength to continue running this race...pressing onward for the final prize...complete healing. :)
"O Christ, do not give me tasks equal to my powers, but give me powers equal to my tasks, for I want to be stretched by things too great for me. I want to grow through the greatness of my tasks, but I shall need Your help for the growing." E. Stanley Jones
9.02.2008
Tuesday Update
The results of his echocardiogram showed that his heart function is good. There may be minimal scar tissue there, but over all his test results were promising. Also his BNP was normal.
He has his appointment with the surgeon tomorrow morning at 9:30 to discuss rescheduling his surgery, but my mom saw this morning that he has already been scheduled for admission next Tuesday, the 9th. We're not certain if that's for surgery or not, but when we find out tomorrow we'll pass on the information so you can be praying for that specifically.
Thank you for your continued prayers.
9.01.2008
Houston Unscathed
These pictures, out our window, show the weather in our area today. Dark clouds, and gusts of wind from time to time, but no rain.
These pictures are of Mike taking a break after his sprint up the skybridge.
Mike decided to sprint up the skybridge, on our walk this morning, leaving me in his dust.
Mike has done well today. He still is experiencing dizziness, but it happens mostly when he first stands up. He's trying to remember to get up more slowly. We did get out this morning and took a nice walk over to MD Anderson Cancer Center. We went by the hospital and they had a free blood pressure check center in there. Mike was a little disappointed that it showed his pulse still being high at 108. I guess we may need to wait a little longer for that to improve.
Tomorrow we have his CT of his heart at 10:45 and an Echocardiogram at 2 p.m. Then Wednesday morning we have an appointment with the surgeon at 10:30. We hope to be able to head home after that. Mike is going to email the cardiologist to see if we'll be given the test results from Tuesday before we leave Houston.
Thank you for continuing to keep us in your thoughts and prayers. We're anxious to get this ball rolling..getting well, and getting home soon. Please pray Mike's heart will begin to show the benefits of having these new medications and that we can safely get on with having the surgery. Please also pray we can continue to protect Mike from any infections while we wait. We praise God for protecting us from the hurricane weather conditions and for not postponing our stay any longer. Please pray for a safe trip home.
"Consider with me the greatness of my God. Measure His judgments; embrace His eternal love. Stand tall in your faith, courageous in your commitment, for He is truly a great God." (from Psalm 48 -Psalms/Now)